The first step in trying to improve your life is asking yourself one question: “Am I happy?”
Not so fast. Don’t answer yet.
Before you do, you need to define what “happiness” truly means to you.
For some, it means big, flashy and fancy things. The new yacht. The expensive car. The shiny jewelry. The stately mansion.
If you’re reading my blog, you’ve already probably realized that these things don’t necessarily equal to contentment. In fact, you may already own all of these things and still feel like they’re nothing…like you’re nothing.
That’s OK, because I’m here to help you determine what can finally make you happy and what’s been holding you back.
When formulating your definition of happiness, I ask you to leave out any inclinations you have towards materialism. Some readers may balk at this request. They might claim that acquiring possessions is part of what gives them satisfaction in life.
But I would disagree.
No object, in itself, can make you happy. It’s the personal value that you put on it that determines your satisfaction with it.
Material objects are just that- objects. Basing your emotions and self-esteem on objects is incredibly dangerous. Objects can spoil. Objects can break. And when they do, there’s a good chance that you will, too.
If you find yourself treasuring objects more than you value yourself, your neighbor or any immaterial concepts, look inward on yourself. Ask yourself what it is that you truly value when you acquire material items.
Do you value the status that comes along with them? Is it the collecting aspect that makes you feel good? Or is it something deeper? Do the items themselves somehow remind you that you’re alive?
People find comfort in materialism for any number of reasons. There is no judgment here, because everyone’s impetus can be different.
But the end result is always the same: people ultimately feel empty amongst their things, because they don’t provide them with love, sturdy self-concepts or happiness.
I won’t mince words: the West can be a difficult place for self-reflection. America, especially, is a nation of consumers. We’re taught to value hard work and what comes from our labor. For most, this means “money”…and money means “things.” Our society tells us that having things makes us who we are. But our society is wrong.
We are what we make of ourselves.
As your mentor on your new journey to self-discovery, I’ll help you along the way to discovering your new self. Your new self will be bold, free of the shackles of materialism and able to withstand blows never thought possible before.
My first challenge to you is this:
If you’ve been a master of the West’s concepts up until this point, expand your horizons and look East.
Exchange your idols. Trade Anna Nicole for Mother Teresa and Donald Trump for Mahatma Gandhi.
Learn about what the East teaches us about ourselves. Familiarize yourself with those fundamental concepts that make us whole and complete human beings without the cars, the jewelry and the houses. Because in the end, all we’ll have is the happiness within ourselves.
All you’ll have is you!
–
Photo by MeLa de Gypsie, flickr.com.
{ 2 trackbacks }
{ 0 comments… add one now }